Love is amazing, it can ignite your soul in a way that makes all things feel possible. Studies show that being with a person you deeply care about releases oxytocin into your blood stream which reduces stress, increases joy, and promotes additional loving behavior. Being with someone you love or even thinking loving thoughts about them actually makes you happier. How awesome is that? But, love can also be torturous. The smartest, most wonderful people in the world struggle with how to give and receive the love they want from the people they want it from. So, when it feels so good how can love be so hard?
Well, it's all got to do with investments. Love is nothing if not a long term investment, and when our investments are not paying out the way we believe they should people tend to get cranky. Cranky people become hurt people, and then often pull their investment (i.e. if I'm not getting a simple hello from you, then I'm not coming home on time tomorrow). Or they shut off from their partner, stop acting kind, and stop treating their partner as their friend. Pulling investments sends their love stock plummeting And that sucks for everyone involved.
So, what things can you do to increase your stock in love? Simple... or simply one of the most difficult things... Buy in more to the things that build love. Even when loving is hard, and your partner is prickly, love them anyway. Take interest in them, be their friend and treat them as your most valued friend. Buy shares of kindness, gentleness, empathy, forgiveness, and compassion. Make sure to also buy 3xs the share of listening that you think might be necessary, because you can never truly listen enough to the person who matters to you the most. Then make time for your partner. Don't give up simply because it is hard, or that you are not getting the response you want. Love is an everyday adventure, and is continually built or destroyed...think about that for a moment, if you are not at this very moment building love it is atrophying...and who wants a dead love life?