Right now If you find yourself thinking, she's crazy, my relationship is easy, and that's the way it should be. I say: Good, great job, and I challenge you to consider if your partner is as happy with you and the relationship as you would like to believe, and if there is anything you'd like different (maybe more time together, less fighting, less time in front of the t.v. or a better sex life?). Because the simple truth is, that relationships do take work.
However, the work doesn't have to feel hard, and it shouldn't feel hard all the time, but it is okay to have hard times. Part of your growth as a couple is done by coming through hard times together, and being all the stronger for them (meaning closer and more connected after). Hard times are basically hands on team building experience. My answer to if relationships should be hard - yes, sometimes they should, but not all the time. Should relationships be easy - yes, sometimes they should but not all the time. So what does that mean relationships should be to get the Baby Bear feeling of just right? Answer: Relationships should be intentional.
What's that mean? It means that you need to be tuned into your partner, into their life outside of you, and with you. You need to be able to give them the love, respect and support they desire, and you desire for them. It also means that you need to be conscious about what you want out of the relationship, your partner and yourself. It means really being honest with yourself and your partner moment by moment, and coming together in the face of the hard truths that exist and challenge you on a personal and relational level.
So, today I challenge you to consider your relationship,..is it hard right now? If yes, how can you make it easier on your partner and grow your love, trust and friendship? Is your relationship easy right now? Great! How can you make it even better and build up your love, trust and friendship bank account now, so that you have enough to tide your relationship over for the next time a situational rough storm comes about? You are worth the work, and so is your relationship.