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The Internal Lever

11/12/2013

 
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You know that moment when you pull up on the tub lever informing the shower system to stop pumping water out of the faucet and instead redirect it to the shower head? This morning I thought nothing of that very action, until a moment later when I had my head under the streaming shower head, and heard my dog barking. The barking triggered a reaction in me, instead of staying under the delightfully warm water, I turned the other lever and abruptly ended my shower before any lather, rinse and repeat could begin. 

You see just like I indicated to the shower that I wanted a shower and not a bath by pulling on that lever, my dog was telling me something. He was saying, "hey, I'm ready to poop now", and the part that made me feel a bit disgruntled was about the context. The inner voice in my head started screaming, "I need to leave in the next 30 minutes. We've already had a walk, and then while my breakfast was hot, you rang the bell, so we waited outside while you spun in your spot 3xs, and then decided, oh wait, I guess I'm not ready to poop yet". Given that it was 6:30 in the morning, I had already been outside with the dog 2xs, and now my hair was wet, and it is very cold outside...I was a little irritated. Wait lets get real here, I was pissed. 

Thankfully my husband also heard the bark, and came to our rescue, taking the dog outside, and sending me back to the shower. So why am I telling you all of this? Well, here's what I thought as I pulled up that lever a second time. Things change, they do, it's inevitable, and there is not always going to be someone who can rescue you from your own irritation. Our plans often don't work out. I've written before about how important it is to grieve lost dreams, or planned for hopes that will never be but I haven't talked about that momentary choice that needs to happen to rescue yourself. That choice to go on. To pull that internal lever, and tell yourself just one more time This will not beat me. I can get through this medical diagnosis, heart ache, child's tantrum, job loss, etc. Because in the moment action is still needed, and when I say action I really mean HOPE.  You can be that hope for yourself.

So today as you struggle with the unexpected hardship you face, take a moment and pull on your lever. Redirect your thoughts to hope and the possibility of good in your life. Yes, this is not what you expected or want, but  it doesn't have to beat you. Rescue yourself to whatever extent is possible at this time. Choose to go on.

No Poop, it matters...

9/18/2013

 
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Years ago I had a long distance relationship with a man who lived 4 hours away. Our relationship revolved around the nightly phone calls, weekends together, and the occasional extended weekend. Months into the relationship I sat him down for a very important talk. You see, while I enjoyed our time together, the end always had a torturous feeling, not because our time together was ending, but because by the time the last day came around I was always extremely uncomfortable. 

You see earlier, before we ever started dating I had heard him joke that "women don't fart, burp, or poop. They just don't." And although I knew this to be false, apparently that thought of what his "ideal woman" was like stuck in my mind, and thus, and (sorry for being so graphic) other things stuck in me when he was around, making for a rather uncomfortable experience by the time a weekend was up. 

You see, I've always known my mind was powerful, but until that time I really hadn't given much thought to just how powerful my unconscious was. And holy smoke, it turns out my unconscious is a body builder. You see, our beliefs whether conscious or unconscious shape how we show up in the world, and whats even more radical is that they also shape how our physical body shows up the in world as well. 

Recently I was doing one of my favorite nerd out activities while in the car, listening to various "ted talks" and I stumbled upon a great one: Kelly McGonigal: How to make stress your friend. For those of you who haven't heard it, I highly recommend it. Or if you want to live longer, take a listen since she goes through some great interventions to make longevity even more possible in your future. Anyway, Kelly talks about how our thoughts about how stress affects our body actually changes some of the physical effects stress has on our body. Did you get that? The way you think about stress affects how your body reacts to it. So, if we can shape our thinking, we can create healthier interactions to things that largely feel out of our control. Talk about an awesome muscle move there,  it is truly fascinating stuff. 

So this week, I invite you to take a moment and play with some of the conscious (and unconscious) thoughts you have, especially the ideas that may be making you uncomfortable or holding you back. Are you suffering with the weight of perfectionism, or a concept that just doesn't seem to fit your identity anymore? It's okay to rework that into something that feels more pleasant, even if it means an uncomfortable conversation or two. You are worth it, and seriously, no crap, what you think matters, even if you are not thinking it very loudly, so think positive things about and for yourself. You're worth it.

I'm not talking to you again until next year...

12/31/2012

 
Well, here it is the close of another year. Growing up I always thought New Years Eve was a stupid holiday, I mean what is really different one day to the next, every day is really the last of that day you'll ever experience, so I just didn't get the hype.

Now as a grown up (yes, I am) I still think it is a rather crap holiday, but it's a needed crap holiday. You see New Years Eve symbolizes HOPE, and we all need a bit more of that. It represent fresh beginnings, and an opportunity for things to be different. While every day actual holds this opportunity, it is hard for us to see it.

It is human nature to become immune to the hope that springs up new with every rising of the sun, but on the days you can ward off the nature of taking things for granted...well those days are special. New Years is special because it allows you to do just that. Heck, it even encourages you to hold on to what you want most at midnight, and kiss it square on the lips (your welcome Skunk). 

So, this year I encourage you to hold on to Hope. Welcome it in your lives, and recognize that every day is a new beginning, and a chance to live the life that God has created you for. It could be even more awesome than you expect!

Happy New Year!

TGIT!!

10/22/2012

 
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Camels embrace the present. So can you.


We are pattern people, it is human nature to live out reoccurring cycles of interaction, with our selves,  others, and our environment. Every Friday I hear countless people exclaim TGIF (Thank God It's Friday), it's basically a once a week American Motto. And what happens on Monday??? People grumble, feel sleepy, and even get told they have a "case of the Mondays". People dread the beginning of another week. So, what's up with this? What really is so different between Mondays and Fridays.

Well, it's obvious, they are both the onset of something new - a new week, or a new weekend. And most of us enjoy our weekends much more than our weeks. Mondays are symbolic of work, and routine, while weekends hold the possibility of freedom, choices, and fun. So, it makes sense that people get excited about the end of the week and beginning of the weekend.

But what would it be like if we started experiencing Mondays, Tuesdays, Wednesdays, and even Thursdays as Fridays? What if we simply woke up every days saying Thank God it's Today (TGIT). I don't want to act naive, I know there are responsibilities and things that make having a TGIT attitude harder to achieve, but it is possible. We can feel excited about a day, any day. It holds the same amount of time that Friday did, even if we spend 8 hours at the office first, there is still more hope left for the day, what are you doing to do with it?

So today, I encourage you to not get caught up in the monotony, and dread that can happen. Instead, embrace today, and even if it is only for 5 minutes, do something fun and worth it. Make tonight a Friday night inside your head, and make it wonderful. You have that power. Today can be a great day, it's the only today you get. TGIT!

    Rebecca's Reflections

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